Enrich Your Life Skills & Career

Dr. Jitendra Nagpal

Life skills are abilities for adaptive and positive behaviour that enable our youngsters to deal effectively with the demands and challenges of everyday life. These are a set of human skills acquired via teaching or direct experience that are used to handle problems and questions commonly encountered in daily human life.  Dr. Jitendra Nagpal is a Life Skills Coach. He is a developmental trainer in youth wellbeing and soft skills for the schools, colleges and corporate sector. In this regular column, he will answer the questions of our readers

Question : I am 22 years old and studying at IIT. I had even dropped a year after school. Even though I am at one of the top colleges, I’m not sure if I made the right choice. I do not wish to do an MBA after this but today the B-tech – MBA combination is what is selling. I’m not sure if this is what I want to do in life. Sometimes I even think of joining the civil services. I am very confused. Please help

Ans :  First of all I would like to remind you that education never goes waste. Getting through one of the top colleges is a proof of you having an aptitude for engineering. It would definitely benefit you in the long run so it would be advisable not to leave it in between.

As far as doing an MBA is concerned, it would be better to pursue it only if you feel you have the managerial aptitude, otherwise you may not be able to achieve as much success as you would achieve after choosing a line of your aptitude. You can always give the civil services exam after completing your engineering as it is a good career options something you are interested in the administrative line. It would help to see a career counselor if you still feel confused so as to figure out more options in accordance with your aptitude and interest. Try to get involved in the various other activities at college in order to manage your stress and keep yourself focused. Remember if you are emotionally satisfied at your work front, financial success would follow.

 Ques : I am 23 years old. I often feel out of place when I’m working. I have very low or rather zero self-confidence and just cannot face people. I am often feeling dominated by others or mocked by them and I can never answer back or be clearly social. Please help me, how do I work on my self-confidence and the way I value myself?

 Ans : Self-confidence is indeed desirable to maintaining of good mental health and wellbeing. To begin with, make a clear cut assessment of your strengths and weaknesses. Nurture your strengths and make them a part of your personality. That will help you build your confidence. Learn to be assertive in order to avoid unnecessary domination. Ascertain your boundaries and communicate. Don’t hesitate to tell your colleague when they trample your feelings or cross your boundaries. They will respect you for your honesty. Work out exactly what you want to accomplish and set goals. This will bring structure and you'll have clarity and purpose about what your life is about. Include work, family, social and personal aspects and each time you achieve a goal, give yourself a little reward. The feeling of accomplishment will increase your confidence significantly. 

Sometimes a change in appearance helps. Let go of the past. You can shape whatever happens from now on and create a new, confident you. Drop self-deprecation. If you repeatedly put yourself down, it will knock confidence right out of you. Avoid indulging in self-criticism. Frequently remind yourself of all of the good things you have done. Spend more time with positive people who support you and make you feel good. Negative people erode confidence like rust upon metal. Confide your problem to a close friend and he/she may be able to help you in communicating with others. Connect with supportive people and recuperate their interest in you. You will feel better.

(e-mail: jnagpal10@gmail.com)